Most Holy Redeemer at crossroads

ON SAN FRANCISCO

C.W. Nevius, SF CHRONICLE


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Most Holy Redeemer is at a crossroads. The Catholic church in the Castro district has arguably the largest gay parish in the nation, and controversial new decisions have members worried about leadership, policies - even that the church might be shut down.

And it all began with drag queens.

When the archdiocese refused to allow drag queens to serve as emcees for charity events at the church's community hall, it fed rampant paranoia about antigay sentiment. The decision was initially blamed on incoming Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone, an outspoken opponent of same-sex marriage who has been championed by extreme conservative Catholic groups. Some read the drag-queen ban as a calculated slap in the face.

Cordileone doesn't start his new job until October, but clearly the issue is bigger than drag queens at a fundraiser. The decision calls into question the responsibility of a church in the community, of the acceptance of all walks of life and the tenets of religion.

"Paranoia is very high," said Supervisor Scott Wiener, who represents the district. "There are a lot of gay people for whom this religion is very important. It's just very, very sad."

Even the possibility of closing the church, despite its illustrious San Francisco history, seems real.

"The (incoming) archbishop holds the keys to this building," said church business manager Mike Poma. "He could close us any time."

And for some, the move to quell the drag-queen decision by declaring that Ellard Hall would be closed to community events only made things worse.

Most Holy Redeemer's new pastor, the Rev. Brian Costello, who did not return a phone call, arrived in July from a church in the Richmond District. But he made a point in his first official message to welcome "old, young, married, gay, lesbian, transgender, affluent, home-cradle Catholics, radical, traditional, questioning and fervent."

So, while he was initially opposed to having drag queens as entertainment for two fundraisers for sobriety and wellness groups at Ellard Hall, he listened when Poma asked him to reconsider.

"I told him, this is just dinner. It's not a strip show," Poma said. "I told him it was going to be a powder keg."

Poma says Costello responded by making two calls to the archdiocese, where the idea was turned down flat.

"We have to give (Costello) a break," Poma said. "He's got a boss, you know. And he's never been immersed in gay culture in his life. He's learning."

What he's learning is that what might seem very strange in Middle America is everyday life in the Castro. Drag queens may not be mainstream, except at Most Holy Redeemer, where they regularly attend Mass.

"We had some boys in miniskirts last Sunday," Poma said. "And Father Costello met with them."

It should also be said that some of the gay groups that have been using the hall have gone way over the top. Several years ago the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence featured a drag queen known as Peaches Christ, who waved a crucifix shaped like a dildo. Even longtime gay parishioners thought that was too much.

The odd part of this manufactured controversy is how well the church has been working. A robust congregation of 450 to 550 members, more than 80 percent of whom are gay or lesbian, consider themselves practicing Catholics. For a religion that doesn't always seem welcoming to gays, that's impressive.

So are services. Poma says he brought his mother to Mass and she couldn't get over the warm sound of "all those men's voices." Poma says the music at Most Holy Redeemer is so renowned that visitors come from all over the country.

"We had some the other day," he said. "Afterward they said, 'You've renewed my faith.' "

Hopefully, incoming Archbishop Cordileone will also attend with an open mind. And leave with the same feeling.

C.W. Nevius is a Chronicle columnist. His columns appear Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. E-mail: cwnevius@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @cwnevius